When describing Abraham's age the Torah uses an odd phrase. "And Abraham was old coming with his days." Our sages explain that the phrase coming with his days is there to describe the effectiveness and fullness of his life. Some people age but have little to show for all those years - their days have come and gone with little achieved. But Abraham "came with his days". Not even a single day was wasted for all of them were full of achievement.

But how is it possible never to waste a day? Don't we all have bad days when our plans are derailed and we don't reach anywhere near our desired goals? Don't we sometimes plan an important task and end up spending the day waiting for the plumber who is coming to repair that leak that is ruining the carpet? Don't we waste time getting stuck in traffic jams or miss an appointment because the furniture delivery was very late. Even Abraham must have had a bad day when he couldn't reach his goals, didn't he?

The answer lies in the definition of a productive and meaningful day. It is impossible for us to control the outcome of each day. Fundamental to Jewish belief is the concept of Hashgacha Protis - that everything happens by Divine design. G-d does not always want our plans to work out. Our destiny, success, health and livelihood are fully controlled by Him. He leads us down the path that He chooses and not necessarily the one that we planned.

But He still gave us the ability to fill every day with meaning, ensuring that it will not be wasted. A productive day is not defined by how much we produce or achieve. It is not defined by the best deals, organizing ourselves and others or gaining recognition or fame. A successful day is one that becomes a catalyst for self improvement, kindness and creating a culture of goodness and morality. Controlling our frustration in the traffic jam, or smiling and saying something nice to the plumber and the delivery man, making them feel good, makes more of a meaningful day than the best outcome of a business meeting. We might be stuck at home but we can still phone a lonely friend to see how they are going or play a game with one of our children thereby strengthening our relationship. We might not always be able to arrive at our appointments on time but we can download an inspiring lecture to listen to in the car in the event of a long traffic jam.

We cannot really control each day's experiences. They might be very different to what we expected. But we can choose how to respond to any situation. We can choose to get frustrated and let the time slip way resulting in a wasted day, or we can choose to use the situation as an opportunity to improve ourselves or make someone else smile. We can give meaning to our lives in ways that we wouldn't have, had our day gone according to plan. Abraham found a way of giving meaning and purpose to every day - we can learn from him and do the same.

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